I have a teenage son and guess what I love him. Guess what else? He is just like any other teenager he is not perfect. He has had his share of good and bad moments. He has literally done things to make me cringe and cry, but he has also done things to make me smile, laugh, and beam with pride. We have our moments, and sometimes it feels like more than not I am always arguing or fighting with him about something, but that's okay. You want to know why? He is trying to figure out who he is and where he fits in.
The other day we were having a discussion (him, his Dad, and I) and he said to us I bet you would be embarrassed of me if I got a tattoo and then went to church with you guys. My husband looked right at him and said "no son we wouldn't, we aren't embarrassed about you and we never will be." He told him that he would strongly advise against getting a tattoo at his age, since it's kind of a permanent thing that you live with for the rest of your life, and lets face it something you think is cool at 16 probably won't be when your 34. Of course my husband is speaking from experience him having gotten a tattoo at 18, which he now wishes he didn't have. But after saying that he once again assured him that we wouldn't be embarrassed about him no matter what choice he made.
Here's the thing I hear people say things all the time like "my son will never have long hair, or my daughter will never wear that, or do this". Well guess what parents does it really matter if your child cuts their hair short or grows it long, or even what color it is. Does it really matter if they get a piercing or tattoo? Does it matter if they sag their pants (something that personally drives me crazy with my son, but I have learned to deal with it-haha) or wear skinny jeans. Guess what-IT DOENS'T. What matters is what's inside and what really matters is that no matter what they do they know that you love them and are not embarrassed of them no matter what!
Yes your kid is going to do stupid stuff. You might get frustrated. It might not be pretty, but being a teenager is hard. There is a lot going on and a lot they have to figure out, and they will. It might take time, it might come with lots of trials and tears, but they will figure things out and turn into great adults and hopefully they will do it with your love and support every step of the way.
When I thought about my son's questions would you be embarrassed of me? I think really what he was asking or wanting reassurance to, is the question-Will you love me no matter what? Yes son I will forever and always NO MATTER WHAT!!!
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